Last night I had a dream that I was being given the choice to turn into an animal via a painless procedure. They said that it will be like reincarnation, so I will have none of my memories. Throughout the dream I was moving slowly toward this procedure until the end where I decided against it. I wanted to continue to be human. I wanted to continue living with Kimblee no matter how challenging it gets.
I think something has changed in my subconscious. For the first time in years, I feel that I am finally no longer suicidal. I had an attempt in 2024 that changed my life. I’ve been fighting for recovery ever since then, and I think I’m finally on the other side of things.
With America directly in a war, I know life is bound to change. I’m not in the service anymore but I have friends who are and I need to support them in any way I can. I need to be mindful of the ways I contribute to suffering and replace them with ways to combat suffering.
A little girl came up to me in church and said she liked my Kimblee plush. I told her I made it and she was like “whoa really?”. It made me happy.
My sister moved out and the paranormal activity in the house has completely died down thank God! I think we won the spirit war.
Let’s do our best again this week.
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