This is a watercolor of Kimblee I commissioned Lux (@nyxmegist on x.com) to paint for me some years back. It depicts Kimblee as a god of war, towering over a battlefield. This is the version of Kimblee I need to invoke now because even though it’s almost Valentine’s Day, my household finds itself in the middle of a spirit war.
My sister initiated a divorce, and her husband’s Greek ancestors are currently waging a war against our Italian ancestors. So many things have broken ever since my sister came to live with me. Flip got injured, my MacBook died, my grandmother’s rocking chair broke… both Flip and my grandmother are fighting in the spirit war. Flip really is God’s strongest soldier.
Kimblee is excited for the spirit war, he gets to show off in situations like these. We also have St. Expedite and St. Anthony on our side. We have a very good chance of winning. I need to pray a protective rosary over my car and my pets. And of course, Kimblee will be making his way into battle. I will commission another painting of him as St. Michael or St. Sebastian to invoke him.
I’ll keep you updated on the spirit war as it unfolds. My house is currently the hotbed of spirit activity because my sister is the target.
This is a watercolor painting of Kimblee and our ragdoll cat Flip that Lux (@nyxmegist on x.com) did for me a few years ago. Flip was still a kitten when this was painted. All day, I have been in a thought spiral about Flip. I have schizoaffective disorder, and ever since Flip got hurt, the voices I hear have been relentlessly negative. They keep saying that Flip will die and it will all be because of me. They call me stupid. They tell me over and over again to kill myself. If I wasn’t on such a high dose of antipsychotics, they would have made me burst out into tears. But I am on antipsychotics, and I have lost my ability to cry, so the only thing I can do while I ride out this wave of psychosis is “the next right thing”.
I’ve been struggling ever since my sister came to live with me, because I have had to mask around her as well. I will continue to mask until she gets back on her feet, and Kimblee has been a wonderful support in this silent fight. I asked him, “What if the voices are right? What if Flip dies because of me?”. He said, “That won’t happen, but if it does, Flip will be with me, waiting for you.”
After that, I felt reality change. Little by little, the voices started to get tired. Little by little, my cortisol levels started dropping. If the worst was to happen, Kimblee would make sure everyone was okay. Flip would be with him, waiting for me to finish my Great Work on Earth. The Great Work is the process in alchemy in which the alchemist finds the metaphorical “Philosopher’s Stone”. Some believe the stone is the alchemist’s equivalent to Christ’s Holy Grail, a relic that carries on the person’s soul, a solar vehicle of sorts. Some believe that the stone is simply not killing yourself even though you really, really want to ( a-la Camus), thereby using all of the allotted time towards building the solar body.
I believe that both these interpretations are valid. For the stone as grail, that would be leaving behing a legacy, children, or body of work. For the stone as being a life full of fighting until the end, it would be not killing your own companion, your faithful body. God will always take the side of the innocent body, and will punish the soul in Hell for killing the unconditionally loyal companion that God Himself gave you. That is something that, in my opinion as a Catholic who has attempted suicide, I think will land you in the enemy’s kingdom. And by enemy’s kingdom I don’t mean a fire and brimstone Hell, but rather another spin on Earth. I believe that Earth is Hell, and by not ascending you are doomed to live as many lives as you need to before you can ascend.
As an alchemist, all I can do on my quest for the stone is “the next right thing”.
Anyway, I say all that to say that Kimblee really helped me out today. When I feel out of control of my situation (injuries to pets, learning moments at work, all of a sudden sharing my space), Kimblee reminds me that he is on the other side of reality, ready to support me. He reminds me that both he and God are only one thought away, and that they will love me no matter how I fail.
Thanks for reading, if you got this far. Hope you had a good day. Let’s finish this week off strong!
Today I didn’t have any clients at my apprenticeship, so I drew Kimblee in one of the Ralph Lauren fw26 coords.
Ralph Lauren Men f/w26
It’s a cold day today, so I wanted to dress Kimblee in something warm and cozy. This sweater looked like it would be just the thing! Megane too because I am weak to Kimblee wearing glasses. The pants are loose fitting and look cozy to wear, too. I just want to give him comfort and style at the same time!
Kimblee is so lovely, he really does look good in everything!
Kimblee and Flip
On Saturday, our ragdoll cat Flip got injured by my hand, a grooming accident. The scissors I was using on her were too sharp and she needed stitches. Luckily, we were able to make an appointment at the emergency vet that same day, thanks to God and St. Expedite. She got her stitches and is on her way to making a full recovery! I learned that with cats, if you want to trim their tangles and mats away, to use clippers/buzzers instead of scissors because it’s safer.
This Wednesday is Waifu Wednesday. I wonder what I should draw. I was thinking something Valentines related, but maybe I should draw Kimblee holding Flip, as a tribute to how brave she was this weekend.
The Pats may have lost the Super Bowl, but the New England Purrtriots won the Kitten Bowl and that’s really all that matters.
This weekend’s guest art comes from Palli (@pallizo on x.com)!
Art by @pallizo on x.com
Palli drew Kimblee so elegantly! I am not brave enough to attempt a motorcycle myself, nor is there much naturally occurring art of him on a motorcycle to begin with, so this art piece is a jewel in the museum. Palli said the cherry lollipop was a nod to his philosopher’s stone and when I heard that, I loved it even more.
Balmain is one of my favorite fashion houses, so seeing him depicted in a Balmain leather jacket as if he was modeling in a magazine ad shoot is catnip to me.
I will draw something fashionable for him in return! Thank you again!
My apprenticeship is halfway over! I just need to make it to May and I won’t have to spend 4 hours in a car every day commuting to the city. Thinking of Kimblee makes me feel better. He loves hardworking people, so even though all I want to do is curl up in a ball and sleep all day, I know he would find me more beautiful if I am hard at work, doing a routine, building little by little toward something. I want him to find me dazzling, so I will keep working hard at my apprenticeship for him, even if the commute is brutal.
I ordered a custom necklace with our names on it. I forgot that I had ordered it, so it almost felt like a present from him. I debated getting a necklace with his first name, but I decided to do his last name because then it can be read as my name and his name or my name and my last name.
Couple’s necklace.
I got the necklace because I wanted it to symbolize our bond. The closer I feel to him, the happier I am. Also this necklace was wayyyy too hard to put on so I will never take it off. I don’t wear my ring because of the nature of my job, but a necklace is something I can commit to.
Hope your day was good. We got the hard part of the week over with! Have a good one.
I got a commission of Kimblee back yesterday! I am over the moon with it! I ordered 6 reaction images of Kimblee, and the artist Momoto (@momotowan on x.com) delivered beautifully! Aren’t they all so cute and fun? Working with Momoto was a great experience, I highly recommend them.
Art by Momoto (@momotowan on x.com)
Custom art is a luxury expense. For the majority of my life, I have not commissioned much art of Kimblee because I could never justify the expense to myself. My grandfather was the same way about food, he never went to restaurants because they “had food at home”. He could never justify the luxury of eating out. It’s not that we can’t afford these things, but we could never bring ourselves to pay others for things we could do ourselves.
However, I recently had a paradigm shift when it comes to commissioning art of Kimblee. I have begun to see it as a way of spreading goodwill in his name, and therefore, it is kind of like offering water and sweets to St. Expedite and money to St. Anthony. The money I spend is not only directly helping someone else, but I also get to see my husband depicted in a whole new light.
I can see why people drop a lot of money on comms. I walk a fine line between loving Kimblee with all my heart and obsessing over him to my detriment. I never want Kimblee to become the leviathan I chase until my destruction. I read Moby Dick, I know how that story goes. That is why I developed a system. Like a little kid who gets an allowance for doing chores, I gave myself a list of actions that are worth CP, Commission Points. If I take my medication, I get a point. If I get to work on time, I get a point. Every full hour I spend working on comms, I get a point. Every time I go for a run, I get a point. Once I collect 50, I can commission someone. This way, I am building good habits, becoming more mindful of my time, and working towards something that I know will help others and genuinely bring me happiness.
Kimblee has been a part of my life since 2004, and he still finds ways to surprise me and make me so happy to this day. I can’t wait until I get 50 more points!
The Patriots are going to the Superbowl! I’m not a huge sports otaku, but the longer I go for a spin on this rock, the more things eventually catch my eye. Football is one of these things. It is both like watching a ballet and watching gladiators battle. It’s American to the core. It has cultures and traditions. I want to view sports as a sphere of interest that is new and exciting, since I feel like the novelty wears off the more things you experience. I think Kimblee would like football and hockey for the semiviolent nature to them, as well as the brutal elegance. One of these days, I should take him to a game. If the Patriots do win the Super Bowl, I doubt those tickets will be reasonable, however.
Art by C.F. on drawfriends.pics
Some kind folks (HondaGibson and C.F.) drew me and Kimblee in Patriots jerseys! I am overjoyed, and seeing us being sports otaku (the most American type of otaku besides maybe /k/ otaku) makes me want to throw us a private Superbowl Watch Party. I want to share my glorious American culture with Kimblee before the empire falls. I think he is supposed to represent America in his series, because of the nature of his alchemy (America synonymous with the concept of The Bomb), and because he was named after the American naval destroyer the U.S.S. Kimberly. So, despite being Amestrian, he is American in spirit. And thus he would like football, and would want very much to watch the Super Bowl. That is my personal gnosis.
By the way, I watched the Super Bowl that Usher played the halftime of when I was inpatient in the mental hospital for the 3rd time. We had a party, the doctor ordered us pizza (anyone from LA know a little place called Johnny’s?), and we even had a cashapp betting pool. I was on a ward for active duty military and veterans, so the company was polite and reasonable, very much so considering why people were there. I have to say, I had a surprisingly pleasant time that year I spent on the psych ward. It’s much like boot camp, I look fondly upon it, and understood that it was fun even though it sucked, but I am perfectly happy never to go back. Oh and now every time I listen to Usher, all I think of is the mental hospital.
Hope you had a good day, let’s finish this week off strong!
Kimblee can really pull off a kilt, that’s for sure! He’s so… Cute! Elegant! Charming! I love him so much.
It was fun to go back in the runway archives and find looks for him to wear. The Dior Menswear f/w23 collection leans more feminine, with flared shorts, kilts, and cozy knitwear with faux capes, but I have to say my husband can really pull the soft and cute look off.
Drawing fashion figures of Kimblee is my version of therapy.
I also finished the embroidery hoop that I showed a concept sketch of some weeks back:
“Hinagiku with Irises”, hand embroidery, 2026.
I really like the way she turned out. This is now the second time I have done embroidery. Embroidery is an artform I want to get more proficient and daring at, because it is a bridge between the fiber arts and illustration. I learned a lot making this piece. I’m happy that she’s on her way to her destined home.
I want to combine illustration with embroidery in a children’s book project I am developing, so I am kind of experimenting a little more with each hoop.
That’s all for me today, off to sleep and hold Kimblee tight. Hope you have a good night, too.
Kimblee and I are going to get a storm this weekend, we are going to get over a foot of snow. If it means having a snow day on Monday, I’m all for it. I can’t wait to take a picture of Kimblee in the snow!
I drew Kimblee wearing more Dior f/w23 fashion. I think I will take pictures around New England and transpose him onto those backgrounds in the actual fashion book, so that it looks like a more posh version of Fresh Fruits fashion anthology. The sweater was fun to do, I don’t know what possessed me to draw every stitch, but I like the effect and will put in similar effort to future knitwear pieces.
Kimblee and I listened to last week’s New Music Friday playlist, here are our top 3 songs:
It’s my plan to make a time capsule of music from this year, and I think 3 songs a week is a good amount.
Anyway, gotta get back to sewing. People have been nothing but patient with me when it comes to commissions, so I have to respect that and put in the work. Are you getting snow this weekend? If so, be safe!
Today’s drawing is Kimblee in another Dior f/w23 ensemble. Out of the whole runway show, I saved 3 favorite looks. I love the way he looks in these clothes. I think I’ve finally nailed down a style for my /fa/ drawings. I think that I will redraw the Dior coords I previously clothed him in to fit this style.
I was watching a video essay about making zines today. I’m talking old fashioned zines, the kind you print out and fold and staple together. I don’t need yet another project on my plate, but it gave me the idea to collect drawings of Kimblee wearing runway fashions and making a sort of doujinshi out of it.
I used to have a book of Harajuku street fashion called Fresh Fruits, and on each page there would be a photograph of someone wearing an elaborate and colorful outfit. I’m not dressing him in Harajuku fashion of the early 2000s, but I thought a book about that size and thickness full of Kimblee wearing beautiful clothes is a project I would invest in. Even if it takes me years to illustrate, I would love to pour my heart into that fanbook for him.
I’ll just draw him in a new coord at least once a week. After a few years, I will have over 150 illustrations. That’s not too hard of a commitment, after all drawing him is a joy. I think I just don’t give myself the permission to do draw for myself. I’m officially giving myself permission. I want to know that over 150 drawings, will my style evolve, improve, or distill? It will be a fun experiment. I love my husband so much. I’m so happy that he is able to give me joy over the simplest things.
